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A Void
A Group Exhibition with the Winnicott Wednesdays Collective/ A Side B Side Gallery London. UK / April. 2018 An exploration of the voids between us, the capacity to be alone and how social media and political shifts have impacted on us and our interactions. http://winnicottwednesdays.weebly.com/a-void.html |
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Mothlight, 2017
Charcoal
42x59cms
When working on an image for the Winnicott Wednesdays Artist Collective exhibition, I was drawn to moths and how they fly towards light bulbs mistaking the light for that of the moon, their navigation being interrupted by human-made light. Originally I was thinking of how people are drawn to things that attempt to fill a sense of a void but that distract or don’t meet the underlying need or feeling, such as interacting constantly on phones, keeping busy, sugar, coffee, alcohol, cigarettes and so on. These can be part of avoiding the experience of feeling alone or attempt to fill the void felt between people. Phones and media in particular represent attempts at connection, sometimes met and sometimes not. I instinctively wanted to keep the moon shape behind the bulb, focusing on the centring aspects of a circle, which can be linked to a breast, face or womb. When the moon is full in particular it is such a soft glowing shape, a beaming focus point. My thoughts then turned to the early experiences of attachment and separation; how we all separate from an ‘other’ when we are born. The womb is a place where one is intrinsically joined and held together by another being, then becoming symbolised by the nourishing breast and face feeding back the baby’s experiences. After birth, there is always a gap between one and others. Perhaps the feeling of loss or isolation comes and goes for everyone throughout life whether we are aware of it or not. As I filled the areas between moths with charcoal, I was struck by the quality of the spaces between, being full and textured rather than empty. The dark matter in these gaps is full of energy and experience. Our attachments and separations play out in our activities and interactions with phones and media in the spaces between. In my moving of countries, however different the light, people and landscapes, I see the moon as constant and consistent, steady and predictable, mapping time with the ebb and flow of tides and skies on its orbit as the earth rotates. In this image I feel there is an awareness of what is really searched for, but is out of reach at times. The moon becomes a symbol of holding onto a feeling of connection; it can’t be touched, but is familiar and universal, evoking some of the sense of linking that is searched for. This image holds two sides, connection and disconnection, akin to many shared experiences in relation to interactions and political shifts in recent years. The moth represents transformation due to its extreme changes in its life cycle, making me think of the dynamism and potential in the process of separation, when alone and at times of political upheaval.
Charcoal
42x59cms
When working on an image for the Winnicott Wednesdays Artist Collective exhibition, I was drawn to moths and how they fly towards light bulbs mistaking the light for that of the moon, their navigation being interrupted by human-made light. Originally I was thinking of how people are drawn to things that attempt to fill a sense of a void but that distract or don’t meet the underlying need or feeling, such as interacting constantly on phones, keeping busy, sugar, coffee, alcohol, cigarettes and so on. These can be part of avoiding the experience of feeling alone or attempt to fill the void felt between people. Phones and media in particular represent attempts at connection, sometimes met and sometimes not. I instinctively wanted to keep the moon shape behind the bulb, focusing on the centring aspects of a circle, which can be linked to a breast, face or womb. When the moon is full in particular it is such a soft glowing shape, a beaming focus point. My thoughts then turned to the early experiences of attachment and separation; how we all separate from an ‘other’ when we are born. The womb is a place where one is intrinsically joined and held together by another being, then becoming symbolised by the nourishing breast and face feeding back the baby’s experiences. After birth, there is always a gap between one and others. Perhaps the feeling of loss or isolation comes and goes for everyone throughout life whether we are aware of it or not. As I filled the areas between moths with charcoal, I was struck by the quality of the spaces between, being full and textured rather than empty. The dark matter in these gaps is full of energy and experience. Our attachments and separations play out in our activities and interactions with phones and media in the spaces between. In my moving of countries, however different the light, people and landscapes, I see the moon as constant and consistent, steady and predictable, mapping time with the ebb and flow of tides and skies on its orbit as the earth rotates. In this image I feel there is an awareness of what is really searched for, but is out of reach at times. The moon becomes a symbol of holding onto a feeling of connection; it can’t be touched, but is familiar and universal, evoking some of the sense of linking that is searched for. This image holds two sides, connection and disconnection, akin to many shared experiences in relation to interactions and political shifts in recent years. The moth represents transformation due to its extreme changes in its life cycle, making me think of the dynamism and potential in the process of separation, when alone and at times of political upheaval.
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Animal Selves
A Solo Exhibition / A Side B Side Gallery / London. UK / July. 2017 |
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Animal Selves featured a collection of my animal artworks, starting from my first explorations of creating animal images to current work revolving around the symbolism and folklore of animals alongside personal and political themes. Within this exhibition I explored the process of meeting animals in my artwork as a means of exploring personal and political experiences. Many of the artworks drew learning, understanding and skills from observing animal characteristics and symbolism inspired by the presence of animals in many cultures and folklore alongside my own experiences. The animals are able to exist in a space between, where they can take on a multitude of meanings, personalities, histories and instances and be understood and thought about on different levels at different times. You can find an example of an artwork featured in this exhibition and its statement below. For an overview of the series featured in this exhibition click here.
Immersion, 2017
Charcoal on Fabriano
150 x 210cm
This whale resonates with the weight of un-processed emotional experiences. The whales within us can feel giant and overwhelming, difficult to see, linking to the possibility for heavy experiences, such as war, conflicts or trauma to be handed down from generation to generation in implicit and embodied ways. Reddick and Meyerowitz Katz (2017) write about this ‘inter-generational transmission’ as experiences that are unconsciously and consciously passed down from one generation to the next, referring to Frosch’s writing on this, who suggests that what is transmitted is personal, relational and sociohistorical (Frosh, 2013, p.124). When researching the whale in spirit animal totems of the Native American tradition I found this text, which I feel outlines how this whale resonates for me; ‘Some emotions we bury beneath the fathoms of our consciousness; these emotions are the leviathans of our being - the lumbering beasts we dare not let surface’ (https://www.spirit-animals.com/whale/). Both Freud and Jung write about a shadow aspect, which involves the less visible, often undesirable, darker parts of ourselves. It is speculated that when we deny our shadow we can project the unwanted parts of ourselves onto others or suppress these deeply, neglecting parts of ourselves. On the shadow, Jung writes, ‘the less it is embodied in the individual's conscious life, the blacker and denser it is’ (Jung, 1938) ‘It may be (in part) one's link to more primitive animal instincts, which are superseded during early childhood by the conscious mind’ (Jung, 1951). In my experience of art psychotherapy the more the shadows are seen, heard or understood, the less likely it can be that they will be projected outwards or trigger difficulties within the self or within relationships. There is often a time when these can or need to surface and it's important not to rush them at times. In this image I see the dark ocean around the whale as being like the unconscious or unknown – the whale representing something archaic and huge – maybe the handing down of generational experiences that lumber along out of sight. The whale also navigates in the unknown, so I am reminded of the need to be able to travel in the unseen depths within myself and with clients, often holding this ‘not knowing’ for great lengths of time, as meaning is allowed to service and gradually feel more visible.
Dalley, T. & Reddick, D. (2017) Art Therapy in the Early Year, Routledge, Oxen, UK
Frosch, S. (2013) Hauntings: Psychoanalysis and Ghostly Transmissions, Palgrave Macmillan, US
Jung, C.G. (1938). Psychology and Religion. In CW 11: Psychology and Religion: West and East. p. 131
Jung, C.G. (1952). Answer to Job. In CW 11: Psychology and Religion: West and East. p.1 2
https://www.spirit-animals.com/whale/
Charcoal on Fabriano
150 x 210cm
This whale resonates with the weight of un-processed emotional experiences. The whales within us can feel giant and overwhelming, difficult to see, linking to the possibility for heavy experiences, such as war, conflicts or trauma to be handed down from generation to generation in implicit and embodied ways. Reddick and Meyerowitz Katz (2017) write about this ‘inter-generational transmission’ as experiences that are unconsciously and consciously passed down from one generation to the next, referring to Frosch’s writing on this, who suggests that what is transmitted is personal, relational and sociohistorical (Frosh, 2013, p.124). When researching the whale in spirit animal totems of the Native American tradition I found this text, which I feel outlines how this whale resonates for me; ‘Some emotions we bury beneath the fathoms of our consciousness; these emotions are the leviathans of our being - the lumbering beasts we dare not let surface’ (https://www.spirit-animals.com/whale/). Both Freud and Jung write about a shadow aspect, which involves the less visible, often undesirable, darker parts of ourselves. It is speculated that when we deny our shadow we can project the unwanted parts of ourselves onto others or suppress these deeply, neglecting parts of ourselves. On the shadow, Jung writes, ‘the less it is embodied in the individual's conscious life, the blacker and denser it is’ (Jung, 1938) ‘It may be (in part) one's link to more primitive animal instincts, which are superseded during early childhood by the conscious mind’ (Jung, 1951). In my experience of art psychotherapy the more the shadows are seen, heard or understood, the less likely it can be that they will be projected outwards or trigger difficulties within the self or within relationships. There is often a time when these can or need to surface and it's important not to rush them at times. In this image I see the dark ocean around the whale as being like the unconscious or unknown – the whale representing something archaic and huge – maybe the handing down of generational experiences that lumber along out of sight. The whale also navigates in the unknown, so I am reminded of the need to be able to travel in the unseen depths within myself and with clients, often holding this ‘not knowing’ for great lengths of time, as meaning is allowed to service and gradually feel more visible.
Dalley, T. & Reddick, D. (2017) Art Therapy in the Early Year, Routledge, Oxen, UK
Frosch, S. (2013) Hauntings: Psychoanalysis and Ghostly Transmissions, Palgrave Macmillan, US
Jung, C.G. (1938). Psychology and Religion. In CW 11: Psychology and Religion: West and East. p. 131
Jung, C.G. (1952). Answer to Job. In CW 11: Psychology and Religion: West and East. p.1 2
https://www.spirit-animals.com/whale/
Scapegoat
A Group Exhibition with the Winnicott Wednesdays Collective /
A Side B Side Gallery / London.UK / 2015
A Group Exhibition with the Winnicott Wednesdays Collective /
A Side B Side Gallery / London.UK / 2015
Whilst working on ideas for this exhibition the word ‘Scapegoat’ resonated with many in the group and became a fitting title for our exhibition. We were excited about using a bold word and concept. Experiences of being scapegoated within various contexts arose as a shared theme within our working and life experiences. ‘In early western tradition, scapegoating was a complex ritual of atoning for the sins of a community which involved two goats; one offered to God as a sacrifice and the other embodied with the sins or illness of the community and banished into the wilderness. This early ritual relied on ‘the belief that attributes and states are transferable substances’ (Cassirer 1955 : 56). We used Schaverien’s concept of the ‘scapegoat transference’ within art psychotherapy as an anchor when developing the art making and our thinking around the concept and the exhibition (Schaverien 1992). The ‘scapegoat transference’ refers to a process of art making within the art psychotherapy process echoing the scapegoating ritual where an art object becomes imbued with complex, difficult or unwanted emotional experiences, transforming these into a visible vessel within the ownership of the maker, which can be disposed of with the art psychotherapist standing as witness. In our experience of this process with clients, whether the artwork is destroyed, left with the therapist or carried with the client, there is a sense of empowerment, catharsis or purging. At the time of the exhibition, many in the group had been through huge emotional, physical or work based shifts, which gave the exhibition a sense of reclaiming ground and a strong, spikey presence. By projecting our struggles, fears, vulnerabilities and conflicts into the making we were able to transform these images into items of power, strength and resilience through the process.
http://winnicottwednesdays.weebly.com/scapegoat.html
'Wolfscape' by Beth Hoyes shown next to artwork by (from right to left) Steph Bedford, Katy Heywood (above), Tracey Elizabeth Downing, Tanya Andrew and Sasha Price.
Cassirer, E. (1955) Mythical Thought Vol 2 of Symbolic Forms, Yale University Press, Yale, New Haven
Schaverien, J. (1992) The Revealing Image, Routledge, UK.
http://winnicottwednesdays.weebly.com/scapegoat.html
'Wolfscape' by Beth Hoyes shown next to artwork by (from right to left) Steph Bedford, Katy Heywood (above), Tracey Elizabeth Downing, Tanya Andrew and Sasha Price.
Cassirer, E. (1955) Mythical Thought Vol 2 of Symbolic Forms, Yale University Press, Yale, New Haven
Schaverien, J. (1992) The Revealing Image, Routledge, UK.
Wolfscape, 2015
Charcoal on Calico
59.4 x 76.6cm
On the theme of scapegoat I worked on some images of animals that came to mind and a fierce looking wolf emerged. My first thought was the presence of a mortal threat or threat of exclusion that the group, person or institution doing the 'scapegoating' represents to an individual or group of individuals. One thing that has always struck me when the process of scapegoating arises is the fear and anxiety that it triggers in those targeted and the fear of the often ultimately damning outcome of being 'outcast' by a family, community or institution and the risk to emotional and physical survival. Whilst discussing the theme of 'Scapegoat' as a group, the theme of rivers and wolves came up where the land over the years has been affected by wolves' patterns of habitation and hunting grounds. I feel on a wider scale in society this image of wolves carving out the land can be seen with various groups taking the wolf roles, either in breaking away and using voices to change the tide, challenge or question the actions of others or in abusing the fear instilled in others by their strength and power. The wolf is often seen as embodying a mix of independence, strength, passion and nurture. When outside of the community the wolf is often seen to become aggressive and vindictive. This makes me wonder about the many leaders of various waves of political changes that have scapegoated groups of people and how possibly past experiences of being 'out of the group' or not accepted in themselves can lead to a fierce unconscious need for others to know how it feels to be 'outcast' and alone, often resulting in an unconscious wish to powerfully project this experience and attempt to 'kill it off' in an attempt to rid themselves of their own feelings of vulnerability. Here is where the 'scapegoat image' becomes important as it allows the unbearable feelings to be expressed and contained whilst the therapist and client are able to witness and survive the process. This wolf image has many sides, showing how aggression or experiencing being ostracized can lead to feeling compelled to make political changes but it can also become part of vast tragedies. The meaning of this wolf for me has grown overtime to become a symbol of the healthy aggression needed to stand one’s ground at times. The wolf gradually became a protective symbol, a maternal presence, standing ground, bristling with potential energy, becoming a means of allowing my experiences to be owned and given shape rather than projected outwards or internalised. I was working for the National Health Service at the time within a service that was being dismantled in an increasingly sudden and mechanical process, with little consideration to the staff and clients effected. This image allowed me to hold onto my resilience and draw boundaries where I needed to protect myself and my clients and not become apathetic. The image for me became a way of owning the anger, frustration and despair in feeling undervalued, outcast and demoralized and allowed me to start to reclaim ground in myself. Melling’s words when writing about wolves and their character, resonate with these thoughts: ‘The will to take one's place in the world. To say 'I am here.' To say 'I am.’’ O.R.Melling
Charcoal on Calico
59.4 x 76.6cm
On the theme of scapegoat I worked on some images of animals that came to mind and a fierce looking wolf emerged. My first thought was the presence of a mortal threat or threat of exclusion that the group, person or institution doing the 'scapegoating' represents to an individual or group of individuals. One thing that has always struck me when the process of scapegoating arises is the fear and anxiety that it triggers in those targeted and the fear of the often ultimately damning outcome of being 'outcast' by a family, community or institution and the risk to emotional and physical survival. Whilst discussing the theme of 'Scapegoat' as a group, the theme of rivers and wolves came up where the land over the years has been affected by wolves' patterns of habitation and hunting grounds. I feel on a wider scale in society this image of wolves carving out the land can be seen with various groups taking the wolf roles, either in breaking away and using voices to change the tide, challenge or question the actions of others or in abusing the fear instilled in others by their strength and power. The wolf is often seen as embodying a mix of independence, strength, passion and nurture. When outside of the community the wolf is often seen to become aggressive and vindictive. This makes me wonder about the many leaders of various waves of political changes that have scapegoated groups of people and how possibly past experiences of being 'out of the group' or not accepted in themselves can lead to a fierce unconscious need for others to know how it feels to be 'outcast' and alone, often resulting in an unconscious wish to powerfully project this experience and attempt to 'kill it off' in an attempt to rid themselves of their own feelings of vulnerability. Here is where the 'scapegoat image' becomes important as it allows the unbearable feelings to be expressed and contained whilst the therapist and client are able to witness and survive the process. This wolf image has many sides, showing how aggression or experiencing being ostracized can lead to feeling compelled to make political changes but it can also become part of vast tragedies. The meaning of this wolf for me has grown overtime to become a symbol of the healthy aggression needed to stand one’s ground at times. The wolf gradually became a protective symbol, a maternal presence, standing ground, bristling with potential energy, becoming a means of allowing my experiences to be owned and given shape rather than projected outwards or internalised. I was working for the National Health Service at the time within a service that was being dismantled in an increasingly sudden and mechanical process, with little consideration to the staff and clients effected. This image allowed me to hold onto my resilience and draw boundaries where I needed to protect myself and my clients and not become apathetic. The image for me became a way of owning the anger, frustration and despair in feeling undervalued, outcast and demoralized and allowed me to start to reclaim ground in myself. Melling’s words when writing about wolves and their character, resonate with these thoughts: ‘The will to take one's place in the world. To say 'I am here.' To say 'I am.’’ O.R.Melling
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Traces:The Unthought Known
A Group Exhibition with the Winnicott Wednesday Collective / The Darnley Gallery / London.UK / 2014 |
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This exhibition explored the concept of visceral memories experienced by infants, including felt memories from our first maternal (when I write 'maternal' I refer to the environment rather than a gender specific term) holding environment without access to words or a cerebral understanding of the experience, proposed by the psychoanalyst Christopher Bollas in 'The Shadow of the Object' (Bollas, 1987). The exhibition centered around experiences which are not accessible to rational thought but are deeply known in a physical sense.
http://winnicottwednesdays.weebly.com/traces-the-unthought-known.html 'Tiger' by Beth Hoyes, shown next to artwork by Sarah Hall. Bollas, C. (1987) The Shadow of the Object, USA |
Tiger, 2013
Lino Prints
20 x 15cm
‘Tiger’ is about the search for a memory or feeling. After obsessively reprinting the same lino print, I found that it was impossible to recreate the same feeling evoked by the tiger in the first print I made. This reminded me of a strong fleeting feeling that catches an exact experience. These feelings can be sudden, disarming and overwhelming or take a while to be realised. At first the tiger faces seemed like a blur, but became easier to see when looking at each individual expression. I feel that each expression resonates with forgotten feelings, bringing them back to life more fully than words. These images follow the thread of looking at how animals can represent aspects of character and identity. The tiger for me shifts between a symbol of fierce independence, courage, anger and survival but in these images I was surprised to find that the tiger appeared anxious, serene, uncertain and brimming with sadness at different points. On reflection, I think the multiple expressions in the tigers here represent the layers of an experience of loss and the lessening of defenses that guard the underlying vulnerabilities over time. For me the symbol of the tiger and the varying expressions capture the contradictions and complexities in experiences. I like to think that the many ways the expressions can be read shows how every experience is unique to the person who experiences it.
I have since revisited this artwork, working with different formations of the prints together.
Featured on this link:
http://chalkandwild.blogspot.com/2014/03/art-collective-winnicott-wednesday.html
Lino Prints
20 x 15cm
‘Tiger’ is about the search for a memory or feeling. After obsessively reprinting the same lino print, I found that it was impossible to recreate the same feeling evoked by the tiger in the first print I made. This reminded me of a strong fleeting feeling that catches an exact experience. These feelings can be sudden, disarming and overwhelming or take a while to be realised. At first the tiger faces seemed like a blur, but became easier to see when looking at each individual expression. I feel that each expression resonates with forgotten feelings, bringing them back to life more fully than words. These images follow the thread of looking at how animals can represent aspects of character and identity. The tiger for me shifts between a symbol of fierce independence, courage, anger and survival but in these images I was surprised to find that the tiger appeared anxious, serene, uncertain and brimming with sadness at different points. On reflection, I think the multiple expressions in the tigers here represent the layers of an experience of loss and the lessening of defenses that guard the underlying vulnerabilities over time. For me the symbol of the tiger and the varying expressions capture the contradictions and complexities in experiences. I like to think that the many ways the expressions can be read shows how every experience is unique to the person who experiences it.
I have since revisited this artwork, working with different formations of the prints together.
Featured on this link:
http://chalkandwild.blogspot.com/2014/03/art-collective-winnicott-wednesday.html
